I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin’ Good Dating Simulator
This game, in a mere 100 hours, has taken everything from me…
I have sacrificed everything I know and love, just to look at that colonel smile.
My wife left me with full custody of the kids. My parents no longer talk to me. Im a mere month away from being
Evicted by my landlord. Ive stopped working, just to play this game. This game has ruined my life, but still, I love it. That sweet sweet colonel. The story is Immersive, and a roller coaster of emotions to play through. Ever since helen left me, this has been the one thing that I still find love in. This game shields me from the cold that is this planet. More importantly, the colonel protects me from the world. The sweet colonel. I never needed helen. All I need is right here, flexing his big muscles, making his next exquisite dish, and being the man I always craved.
– Real player with 256.6 hrs in game
Read More: Best Cult Classic Dating Sim Games.
With stage 5 terminal cancer, the doctors told me it couldn’t be cured. I seen this game come up on my recommended list. I thought to myself “With only hours left to live, I might as well spend my time doing something I enjoy” Starting the game I was filled with immediate joy. The characters were absolutely lovable. The story line has the depth that can only be rivalled by very few AAA titles out there. Every click left me guessing “What’s going to happen next?” and “Will I get to try another one of the Colonels chicken wings of pure ecstasy?” Before I knew it, I was in the kitchen, cooking with the Colonel, helping him create Nan’s potato and gravy. It was absolute bliss!
– Real player with 10.8 hrs in game
The Last Express Gold Edition
I think this may well be the greatest game ever made. Yes, the controls are clunky as all get out. Yes, for people used to today’s games the ultra-high-tech-for-1997-digital-rotoscoping technique looks extremely antiquated. Yes, you’re dropped into the game with no idea what to do, and you’re going to fail. A lot. But at the same time “The Last Express” includes:
- Probably the best-developed characters in any adventure game I’ve yet played (the weakest is arguably Robert Cath, who the player controls, but even he has an intriguing and irritatingly-largely-unrevealed-due-to-lack-of-a-sequel backstory). By the end of the game you know what they want and what makes most of them tick, and since certain bad things are more or less guaranteed to happen to a number of them the result is the equivalent of an emotional shovel to the face.
– Real player with 16.0 hrs in game
Read More: Best Cult Classic Mystery Games.
Ahead of its time but stuck in the past
First read about this game way back when it came out, in a magazine I still have, where the reviewer was left in complete awe because of unique design for an adventure game. Ever since it occupied a small cluster of neurons in the back of my head, waiting for me to play it and its moment to shine. I should say I never played the original so my review will only address this 2013 port, with some inferior exceptions others have noticed.
It plays like Myst, from 1st person perspective with static scenes as you move around, but is set in realistic environment of an vintage luxury passenger train called Orient Express. The whole game takes place in the same 4-5 vagon carts with beautifully rendered backgrounds. You move by clicking edges of screen with mouse cursor that contextually changes functions to forward, backward and left or right turn, with interaction prompts for opening doors and object/NPC interaction.
– Real player with 9.8 hrs in game
UNO
So this game is tons of fun, I gotta say, it’s fantastic to play with a group of friends because, as always, Uno is great fun. The card packs and new rulesets are also fantastic and really change up the pace of the game and make it even more fun, beyond what normal Uno can provide.
That’s about all it’s got going for it though. The coding of the game itself and the networking are absolutely atrocious. For absolutely no reason, people will drop from games, be incapable of fully loading into games, crash on startup, etc. etc.. Many core features (like calling out Uno) are broken to a degree that makes a potential win into a complete loss. Needless to say, the entire game is pretty much broken somewhere somehow despite the fact that it’s literally just Uno. I have no idea how you screw up Uno this badly, but these developers apparently made that a reality. If it was just one or two of these bugs in isolation, I could put up with it, but the quality of this game makes me feel like unpaid interns created it and that it’s literally just a project for Ubisoft interns to work on that generates them some cash on the side. There’s no care at all for quality put into it, which I mean sure, it can’t be that popular of a game and isn’t a flagship, but it still flagrantly displays it’s made by Ubisoft and is grossly broken. Not that I expect anything else out of Ubisoft, but for god’s sake, it’s just a damn card game, how do you make it so that just to play an online card game it can take 20 minutes of restarting games just to get it to work, only to then have people just disconnect at the start or mid-game for no reason despite them having no connection issues at all on their end?
– Real player with 14.8 hrs in game
Read More: Best Cult Classic Online Co-Op Games.
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– Real player with 13.4 hrs in game